Friday, February 22, 2013

The Pit of Despaaaair

I have been violently morning sick. Again. I was hoping to avoid it this time around, but no such luck. 

I am trying not to completely despair. It's hard not to when food doesn't appeal to you, but you have to eat or you'll throw up, but you'll probably throw up anyway, so whatever... Hydration is a problem. I am worthless during the day. I manage to get the baby fed and dressed, and then I lie around on the sofa. Sometimes I lie around on the floor so that he can climb on me. That seems to make him happy, and it makes me feel better since I feel awful about not being able to do much with him right now. I told him it's ok, soon he'll have someone to play with all the time. 

I have my first prenatal appointment one week from today. I'm far enough along that I'll be able to hear the baby's heartbeat, which is exciting. I have to remind myself that this is all for a good cause. Also, Elijah has been wonderful about sleeping through the night for me these days, so things aren't all bad. He only wakes up once to eat. I could kiss him - and I do. I make terrific babies; it just takes a lot of up-front investment.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Happy Valentine's Day

Dear Adam:

1. I love how you love the Lord.
2. I love your voice.
3. I love your smile.
4. I love your mind.
5. I love your beard.
6. I love that you don't play mind games with me.
7. I love that you don't let me play mind games with you.
8. I love your jokes.
9. I love your silly songs.
10. I love watching you play with our son.
11. I love how hard you work.
12. I love how you take care of us.
13. I love that nothing is ever too hard or out of reach for you to try it.
14. I love your convictions.
15. I love your touch.
16. I love a few things that I can't post here, so
17. use
18. your
19. imagination.
20. I love that you have a strong intellect, but you still know when to trust your gut.
21. I love that you can make (almost) anything.
22. I love that you pamper me when I need it.
23. I love that you make me a better person.
24. I love your confidence.
25. I love that you married me.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Color Me Crazy

Well, we're pregnant again.

Here are answers to some questions that I suppose you're probably asking.

1. 7 weeks
2. September 18
3. 17 months apart
4. No, it wasn't planned
5. Yes, we know where babies come from
6. Crazy? Maybe. Probably.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous about this pregnancy. I wouldn't characterize myself as suffering from "paralyzing fear" (that would be too dramatic), but maybe a couple of notches down from "terrified."

I am nervous about everything that normal pregnant women are nervous about (miscarriage, defects, nutrition deficiencies, never looking like a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model again) with the added dimension of Knowing What Can Go Wrong. Knowing What Can Go Wrong is a terrible thing, and it just hovers over me all day. 

(Also, may I just say that finding out you are pregnant is a weird thing. It's like someone came up and said, "You are making a person! How exciting! Oh, yeah, and in about 8 months you are going to defy the laws of physics by pushing an object yea big out of a hole yea small as you feel pain like you've never imagined. Isn't it wonderful?" Kind of a mixed bag.)

I've been trying to find an M.D. (no midwives for me this go 'round) who can deliver in my favorite hospital. I've been advised to request a referral to a perinatologist (which I believe is the technical term for a "high-risk doctor") as well, which should put me on the radar for all the things I'm at risk for (a long, long list. Basically, I have a 40% chance of it all happening again - but who's counting?)

In the meanwhile, I'm eating well and taking care of myself. I know a lot more this time about what is good for me. Also, my morning sickness is almost non-existent (I mean, it's there, but only in the morning and no throwing up). I feel a lot better than I did at this point with Elijah. I worry that it means the pregnancy won't 'take,' but whatever it means, I am enjoying not puking my guts out 9 times a day.

I am trying not to be afraid. It doesn't do me a lick of good. 

The baby is the size of a blueberry.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Mommy MadLibs

1. The __________[noun] starts out so nice and clean until there's __________ [type of food] all over it.    

2. It was a lot easier to __________[verb] with two hands.

3. I can't remember the last time I _________[hygienic activity].

4. The baby _______[verb-past] all over me ___[number] times today.
                    
5. My _______[body part(s)] is/are so ________[adjective].

6. I ______[need] more ________[sleep].

Monday, December 24, 2012

Days 22 and 23

Day 22: Created Women

Their mission: Created Women is a ministry in Tampa that focuses on women who are caught in prostitution or other sex industry and offers them a way out of the industry and a saving relationship with Jesus Christ. I urge you to watch the introductory video to their website. It really explains their vision way better than I think I could.

What you can do: Created has a many-sided approach to giving women an identity in Christ and a relationship with their community. It offers part-time work at several "micro-businesses," and there is a year-long residency program at a home for personal restoration called "The Sanctuary." $500 a month pays for one woman's residency. You can give either a one-time amount or make a monthly commitment.

Day 23: Final Day

Well, today is Christmas Eve, and I'm going to call this project complete. I feel good about the coverage I've given to the non-profits I mentioned, although I know there are many more that I would have liked to profile. I have just one last statement to make before I go put on reindeer antlers and make faces at the Baby.

Please make giving a part of your life. Don't just give because it's Christmas and you feel bad when you hear about hurricane victims or the homeless or the starving or the slaves or the oppressed while you eat turkey and open presents in a warm house. These people are hurting year-round. However bad things are for you, there's someone who has it worse.

If none of these programs spoke to you, find something that does. If you become the sort of person who gives of himself or herself, you will like yourself more. That's just the way it works. You could be the nicest person in the world with a robust self-esteem, but you will still feel better just for giving. Give your stuff, buy stuff to give, give your money. You know, that green stuff people kill for. Think of everything you earn in terms of what you will give away. Your life and our country would be better for it.

Christians: this is not an option. Give to what you care about, give to what God calls you to give, give what you can, give more than you "can." Change you life to be able to give more. This is our calling, and we can meet it with a cheerful heart!

I will probably not be back on until after the New Year, so a very merry Christmas and happy holidays, and I will see you next year!

Days 20 and 21

Day 20: Mommies Little Miracles

Their mission: Mommies Little Miracles is a preemie advocate and support group for parents of preemies in the Tampa Bay and surrounding areas. It was started in 2008, and I discovered them a couple of months after Elijah was released from the hospital. They are an incredible resource for parents who are navigating life during and after their NICU experience. We meet once a month to chat and share our experiences (and to simply unwind), and I have been so incredibly blessed to have so many moms who have been through a similar experience as I. They host parent "social nights" at a local hospital to give parents in the NICU a chance to meet each other and get their minds off of their situation, and they host an annual baby shower at the same hospital to benefit mothers who most likely never had a baby shower before having to unexpectedly give birth.

What you can do: You can donate money, (their website is still getting sorted out, but you can contact them easily enough) but you can also donate new baby gifts (clothes, towels, bathtubs... anything parents need for their infants) for their baby shower and other events. And this is just for the Tampa Area. If you have a heart for the NICU family, there are organizations all over the place that offer support for parents of premature and sick children, as well as bereaved parents. If you want to support these efforts, all you have to do is a little research to see what you can do in your area.

Day 21: Ravi Zacharias International Ministries

Their mission: RZIM states it's mission as, "to reach and challenge those who shape the ideas of a culture with the credibility of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Distinctive in its strong evangelistic and apologetic foundation, the ministry of RZIM is intended to touch both the heart and the intellect of the thinkers and influencers of society through the support of the visionary leadership of Ravi Zacharias." As a Christian and a student, I appreciate the academic and apologetic support of Christian beliefs, which is what Ravi Zacharias and his associates provide. Ravi Zacharias is a brilliant speaker and apologist, and the resource that he is to the Christian community is incredibly valuable. My husband and I have benefited from his many speeches and from those of the other speakers in his ministry. Their vision says it all: "to build a team with a fivefold thrust of evangelism, apologetics, spiritual disciplines, training, and humanitarian support so that the mandate of I Peter 3:15 might be fulfilled: to set apart Christ in our hearts as Lord and always be prepared to give a reason for the hope that is within us, with gentleness and respect, all for the glory of God."

What you can do: Donate money! That's what they need. They have events all over the world, and their resources are available to all who need them because of the donations of people who believe in the work of this ministry. If you are a Christian believer, please check out Ravi Zacharias and consider supporting their work this season and in the coming year.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Days 18 and 19

Day 18: RCMA

RCMA is an abreviation for "Redlands Christian Migrant Association." They are a childcare organization that offer quality care and education to the children of Florida's migrant farming families. They are based out of Immokalee, Florida (which, oddly, is where my husband is from) and they have branches in many farming communities across the state.

Their mission: Their website explains their vision and goals - "RCMA opens doors to opportunities through quality child care and education from crib to high school and beyond.
  • To provide quality child care
  • To provide children and their families with support services
  • To provide educational opportunities and improve the health and general welfare of children and their families
  • To involve parents in the educational process and in public policy decisions affecting their children and families
  • To increase public awareness of the lifestyle of migrant and seasonal farm workers and the rural poor
  • To provide opportunities and encourage the professional development of staff hired from the communities served."
They offer services to nearly 8,000 children ranging in ages from 6 weeks to 12 years. They offer charter schools, VPK and Head start programs, teen parents programs, and reading progams.

What you can do: You can donate financially to RCMA, or you can give to their reading program. They have a great emphasis on literacy and English proficiency, since many of the children who come to their programs come from Spanish-speaking homes. Many parents who speak only Spanish depend on the English proficiency of their children in order to communicate with non-Spanish speakers, so the literacy and fluency of these children are incredible assets to their families.

Elijah at about 1 month old
Day 19: Your Local NICU

So, here is another shameless plug in favor of a topic that is very personal for me. I don't have a link for you, because it has to be based on your own local hospital needs, but here's a little background.

NICUs are really dreary in a lot of ways. There's a lot of pain, fear, trauma, and other awful feelings and experiences that sort of bring the place down. There are so many sick, tiny, fragile babies and parents whose good spirits are in a similar state.

There are many things you can do for a NICU, depending on the hospital's policies. One thing is just to donate. (You can also look at my March of Dimes post, and I will be posting about a local group that I am a part of later called Mommies Little Miracles. There are many such organizations across the country). Hospitals run through money fast, so a good idea is to host a fundraiser or drive or otherwise try to raise a good chunk of money. There are other little things you can do, though, that are really nice and mean a lot to parents. You can donate clothes, blankets, toys, mobiles, swings (AND BATTERIES!), or other infant things. Because these babies are so fragile, you probably don't want to give them your used things - germs get around fast in hospitals, and it's best to limit contamination. I remember one day I came into Elijah's room and their was a little gift bag with a really nice burp cloth wrapped in ribbon. I have no idea who gave it to me - there was no note or card - but it was such a sweet gesture that I will never forget it.

Some hospitals also allow volunteers to come hold babies, especially ones that need more attention than the nurses have time to give (Elijah benefited from many such volunteer visits. He would holler pretty loudly if you weren't paying attention to him!). The hospital might prefer former or current nurses to hold the babies, but you can check their policies. It doesn't take much to really brighten the day of a baby or parent who is enduring a NICU stay of any length, so please keep these families on your mind as you do your Christmas shopping.